Earth, Water, and Life

I am hosting an art talk relating to my practice in Clay, Fiber, and Watercolor art. This project is part of a grant from the Arrowhead Regional Arts Council in Northern MN.

I will be exploring the results of agitation and water to create works of art and how the same art can be therapeutic while being reshaped by life’s agitations.

You are invited to attend and participate.

****This activity is made possible in part by the voters of Minnesota through a grant from the Arrowhead Regional Arts Council, thanks to appropriations from the Minnesota State Legislature’s general and arts and cultural heritage funds.**

Beginning with the End

I completed my residency in June 2023. The experience was cathartic and was a turning point for me professionally. I had personal struggles including estrangement from a child. The loss of a child, by their choice, is a crushing blow. I had to face my failures as a mother and come to terms with what was left of me absent from that role.

Choosing to be anything else was like searching through the darkest room with sharp obstacles at every step. I spent much of my time in the Attic working on the mediums I find most rewarding to work with. I found that the components of my art coincided with the stage of my life I was grappling with.

Taking form

The most significant thing I learned was that I had no choice but to feel my way through the darkness. It wasn’t going away on its own. I had no choice. As I worked with the Clay, I added water and pounded it, wedging it between my hands against the hard surface of my workspace. I manipulated what amounts to a bit of earth and water into a sculpture that told the story of how I felt. I cried and my tears added to the moisture of the earth in my hands.

The same formula held true for the fiber that I used in my studio. In an effort to make something beautiful from woolen scraps, I had to add water and pound the fiber until a felt sculpture emerged.

Lastly, came the realization that the watercolor paintings also required the agitation of the pigment blended in water to complete the process of painting an image.

The Agitation was Key

In the darkness, I found the answer to my becoming. I found the value in the agitation and the pain that life brings occasionally. Just like the pain of childbirth, we endure it to find the beauty of a new creation. In my case, I gave birth to a new version of myself. I welcome the process and am less afraid of the pain and agitation that leads to form. I see it for what it is. I necessary step in the process of living this life. It changed my perspective completely.

Water Breaks

I named this sculpture Water Breaks. Originally, the name indicated the break in my relationship with a child. The sadness of the loss. Then I imagined the joy I’d want my child to experience. I was relieved that I had raised a child who had the wherewithal to choose herself and her happiness, above all. I had not been a good example of that kind of personal strength. The darkness was lifting as I observed more closely. It was not my child that was playing in the stream of my tears. It was me. I had found the joy in my work and I was exploring a part of me I had not known and never allowed into the light.